Submitted by amgreen on Mon, 07/28/2008 - 22:25.

By Anna Urquiola-Green
When I was invited to write an article about a Filipina’s life in the UK I jumped at the opportunity. Mainly because I want to share the experiences I had in this country and quite a lot of these were eye-openers for me.
Moving here three years ago, I learned to adapt quickly especially with the climate. My family and I spent the previous 10 years in the Middle East and from a place where there is only one season - summer, and here in England when they have 4 seasons, it is a total shock to the system. After all, out here one can sometimes experience 4 seasons in one day! I did enjoy shopping for clothes and acquiring a few pairs of boots and not realising that after winter, you have to store the bulky clothes you’ve collected which has taken space in the closet. This is one of the few instances a Filipino’s inborn talent of maximizing the space of a cardboard box when sending pasalubong (presents) back home to the Philippines comes in handy.
Although we Filipinos have English as a second language in the Philippines, here in the UK, I have realised that I still have a lot to learn too, not with the accent but the ordinary words we know. When somebody offers you a fag, it doesn’t mean they’re fixing you up on a same sex blind date, it is an offer for a cigarette! I must have heard this line before I just can’t remember where but it does show that a single word can mean two different things and could land you in hot water.
There are no eggplants in England, they have aubergines. And no, it’s not a colour, that’s what they call it here. When someone says chips, it’s not the chips you see at the casinos or the chips we eat as merienda/snack. Chips means French fries and crisps are chips i.e. potato chips or in England they call it potato crisps, are you confused yet?
Shop means the place where you go and buy things and store is a verb. For example, you store your shoes in the box. It’s no wonder that most Filipino nurses when they come to work here have to relearn English. After all, if his/her patient complains of a hammering headache, she might write down in the patient’s medical records that a hammer is responsible for the patient’s migraine! These are a few of the many English words one has to re-programme inside a Pinoy’s brain when coming to England. And most important too is the way you spell the words as you who’s reading this article might have noticed already.
What’s the food on my table? As a Filipina married to a British, I have incorporated Filipino foods in our menu but with a British twist. Such as when cooking nilaga or pochero, I don’t include saba (cooking banana) as my family considers it strange to include a fruit in cooking stew or in a casserole dish. I would substitute instead potatoes and/or cabbages instead of other ingredients that my family would find acceptable. Bagoong or shrimp paste (which one can buy in Chinese speciality shops) I have learned to forego in this household as the smell might offend my husband’s sensitive nose and the neighbours too!
Most important of all is when hosting parties. Filipino culture back in the Philippines dictates that when one hosts a party it’s always best to prepare more food than necessary as the host loses face if one runs out of food, Here in England, when you host a party, the number one rule is to never run out of drinks. It doesn’t matter if your guests starve a little as long as you keep the drinks flowing. After all, when your guests are inebriated, they would not probably remember that you didn’t serve enough food for the party!
Living here in the UK has made me appreciate more the life I had back in the Philippines. Doing household chores in this country makes me think of the household helpers we sometimes take for granted back home. When painting the interior of our house, I look back and wish I could beam up, as in Star Trek, that handyman we regularly hired to paint our bedrooms. But living here in England made me also become more self- sufficient and assertive. After all, that’s what life is about no matter where you live. To quote my favourite saying: If life deals you lemons, make lemonade, if tomatoes, make Bloody Marys. And that’s how I live my life here, some days are lemons, some days are tomatoes.
About the author
Anna Green our ka-pinay correspondent from UK, is married to a british national and currently working part time in a primary school, with one child. They lived for a decade in the middle east till they finally decided to move to Chelmsford, England permanently
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Comments
hammering headache
I love that saying "hammering headache" in fact here in Wales always heard...."my head is killing me" or my feet is killing me or someone say im going to see quack....haha.....or kids usually say am starvey...not hungry.... ..it is true some pinays reverted to take it
had experience here as well, when i had a little baby and have another little baby then come three little babies i've got, so guess thats totally hard enough very handy mommy am i, my hubby and I get a nanny which is called "baby sitter" in our term but she does instead of helping me carry the baby and make calm down if baby crying but no and NO.....what shes doing is ........lots of words advicing me how to do that to this or carrying the baby, how to look after, ei to feeds of these three babies.......im just say awww......i want to ride a bus and go home .....lol........but finally its useful what she advice to me, i manage then after all.........it is really different living in abroad if we have in DIY or SOS we double it in abroad.........learning and coping things and stuff thats additional knowledge we've got.......
CONGRATULATIONS ANNA
CONGRATULATIONS ANNA. NOW IT'S THE INQUIRER , TOMORROW MIGHT BE THE TELEVISION....JUST LET US KNOW WHAT CHANNEL OKEY..LOL. AGAIN CONGRATULATIONS.
Bright days & dark days...
This I translated from a course specifically targetting foreign women living in the Netherlands.
Apparently, some women undergo depression when they cannot cope with the cultural or traditional differences when living in a foreign land.
Unlike Corrine, I have my dark days. Aaaaa... why did I have to listen to statistics! It is said that it takes foreigners 5 years to adjust to life here in the Netherlands. This is my third.
Anna, love your article! It made me feel that I am not alone with mixed feelings. Bring on those lemons and tomatoes!
Mica K
The dark days..
Mika you are quite right not to be concerned with statistics on how long it will take to adjust living in a foreign land.
For some it could take longer and for some it never happen. The settling down process comes with our desire to be there and to make it work. I really don't believe there is a set time for this to happen.
Darks days happen to all concern living away from home including me. What we associate with dark days is when we miss everything to do with home and ie families, friends,food,weather and the little things like traffic (or maybe not). Everything and anything we find comforting.
When one feel down,try imaginings those OFW's living away from home alone without their immediate family. This, I can share it with you with a degree of understanding. I have worked and lived in HK for many years and it wasn't easy especially the first few weeks,months or years. It is remarkable I have managed to stay there for more than a decade.
I can not recall if I had dark days or when I had them but I can assure you they do happen to most if not all to anyone who are living away from home.
The bright days..
....and we have bright days too. Our family and the friends we made. This site and other sites we come to gather. We have the virtual world to connect with all Filipinos and all through modern technology.
The most important thing is we are living in a country where things work better and do not have double frustrations ie. the stagnant economy, jobs, etc. Most importantly we have the experience and priviledge to learn more and share to the community. Where we come from and what we can offer.
We should pride ourselves since we are one creature who can fit in and adjust where ever we are placed in this planet. Now,smile my friend and we are here for your comfort.
Woops...
Did I make it sound like I am taking the course for depressed foreign women? I just happened across it when I did some tests a while ago. I'm nosy and poke my nose in everything!
I have more bright days than dark days now, thanks to friends I've made here and friends online like you!!!
Mica K
We'll always have lemon and tomato days wherever we live
I totally agree with you both. Living in a foreign land is not easy especially if you don't have your family with you, we're just lucky that we are the opposite. But I would think that no matter where a person lives be it his homeland or in a foreign country we all have our bright days and gloomy days. It's just a matter of how you deal with it... by adapting to your new environment and culture but at the same time retain your own identity and still be proud of it.
Puto and Kutsinta
Can we have bibingka with your lemon Anna? Well, you cannot beat the food in the Philippines. I don't rush to UK for the food,but mind you I would have 3 meals a day or maybe 4 or 5 when in Manila.
I eat fish and chips occasionally with mushy peas( from the Northwest of England). and the occasional Lancashire hot pot! (stew). I cannot live without my rice and anything Asian.
My attitudes to life might have change but my quest for the great bibingka and ensaymada hasn't left me.
Living in a foreign land.
Living in the UK is like stepping into a new dimention of life. We learn to embrace the cultures and differences in a way acceptable to both. It needn't be an end of what we know before but what we can learn and share.
Living away from home is never easy, There are barriers and culture clashes. But,in time we can begin to understand each other differences.
For those living in UK or planning to live here. We have to be aware what we find acceptable back home might not be acceptable in here.
We have to understand,we cannot expect people to accept us with open arms the moment we stepped into their place. There are language,attitudes,behaviours,mannerism we may find a little different from us. As,mention above,there are so many things that are different from what we know back home. I believe in respecting each others differences.
Filipinos are adaptable in everyway,and I am possitive that we will never comes into difficulty in the near future to come.